​

Once upon 1974, three high school girlfriends from a coal-depleted mining town in West Virginia fell deeply in love with the Rolling Stones, only to stumble upon a life-changing discovery:

​

They freakishly resemble Mick Jagger, Mick Taylor and Keith Richards!

AND they possess an uncanny ability to impersonate them!

 

Completely obsessed (and always desperate for attention) the Fangirlz have an undying need to foist their Fauxing Stones act upon their unreceptive high school peers by regularly hijacking the stage during school dances and proms. They also stalk every guy they encounter that is unlucky enough to bear a resemblance to a Rolling Stone. 

​

Failing to mature in college, they collectively drop out to pursue a short-term career in balloon sales at Disney World only to learn that the Rolling Stones' are launching their 1978 Some Girls promotional tour. Convinced it is their destiny to meet the Stones, they "borrow" one mom's car and set out like three female Don Quixotes on a sacred quest to meet the Satanic Majesties of Rock-n-Roll. Dreaming of showing the Stones their awesome impersonations, the fangirls stalk the Stones at their hotel but are too naïve to know that when you're stalking rock stars you should always check the hotel bar. When the Stones slip through their fangirls fingers, the threesome embark on a relentless concert-to-concert pursuit through three states resulting in a series of scream-inducing near misses and I Love Lucy-ish misadventures.

​

Undeterred by the obvious fact that they are the worst stalkers in the history of rock-n-roll, their next move is an actual move—to England—where they continue to make major life decisions based solely on Rolling Stone proximity.

 

But this leads to more misadventure and existential questions like,

​

Was moving into a Home for Intellectually Disabled Adults just to be near

Keith Richards' house a really clever Fangirl idea . . .  Or just plain crazy?

 

Sometimes a Fangirl has gotta scale walls,  hide in moats, sleep in scary places,

survive high speed chases, cross an ocean, and gently strum Keith Richards' guitar

to discover that the Stones were right:

​

You can't always get what you want!

​

But if you try sometime . . .

And then you try and try and try some more . . .

And trespass a little too . . .

(Or trespass a lot . . .)

You just might find

That you've become what you're meant to be.

​

​

(Yeah, this is my memoir.  Scary, isn't it?)

​